I am honored to have this special guest blog post by Pastor Jen Kinnamon, who has fostered and adopted. Sign up for her newsletter to keep up with her journey as a US missionary.
There’s a question I struggle with when a child is deemed ‘unadoptable’ by the authorities that provide care for that child. The question is: ‘Can someone really be beyond hope?’. Knowing what’s been done to that child in their early years, seeing and hearing about their outbursts, behaviors, lack of empathy for the consequences, being unable to connect with any caregiver in their life and not really having the opportunity to do so, they are deemed unsafe for family life. And in some cases even the highest equipped residential programs don’t want that child. My heart aches and wrestles, wondering how can a child that had no choice in their life not even get a chance? In all honesty, I, like many foster and adoptive parents, have come to the point of removing a child from my home for safety concerns.
I take this question to God, and He reveals the depravity of Paul, the worst of sinners, and yet God still adopted him into His family and changed him. In my research about early childhood trauma, the long term affects can be overcome. Even science shows us through neuroplasticity that the brain Can Change. This gives us a glimmer of hope. Dr. Bruce Perry says we heal best in community. But then how can they know if no one shows that child love? How can they know God if no one loves them like God does? Through being loved is where a person can begin to love and build connection in relationships.
So, what about the kids that are to forever be in group homes or institutionalized even into adulthood because of the behaviors displayed due to their intense childhood abuse and neglect? I believe there is Something we can do to begin to build trust and show God’s love to that child. It’s what James 1:27 says: to visit the orphan and widow in their distress. If the state has ruled a child to forever be institutionalized, then we go to them, visit them, pray for them, and do something to impart to them the hope we have in Christ. I believe there will be noticeable changes that will happen. God is still building the vision, and we’re just the vessels.
Jennifer and her husband Kenneth are serving as missionaries with US Missions. Equipping missionaries to reach the lost in America is the heartbeat of US Missions. Their mission is to fulfill the Great Commission in the United States through partnership with the local church. The Kinnamon's focus, as foster and adoptive parents themselves, is preparing churches to equip foster and adoptive parents. Additionally, Jen has written Chapters 26 and 28 in Help! I'm a Foster Parent (link below)!